guess what?
Rainy eyewater sizzles and pops in the maze of interpretive electronics
on which i'm writing.
i have been thinking about you a lot recently.
this is not to say
i don't think of you
every day,
words that shrink into
boiling
brimming
blistering
tears.
a long time ago
when my mind was raw
i stood on tiptoe
and watched you draw;
said i'd seen you run
and i knew your son
said he was good, too
and then you looked up.
said, he's amazing
and i had to agree
and you offered me a seat
said, sit beside me
underneath this old growing drawing tree
in the middle of a growing school in a growing growing city.
well i sat a while and you said something
and i nodded and i smiled and we started to sing
VERY BADLY but together.
then you got up really fast
said i have to go
hug, said, nice to meet you
and i didn't say, i know!
i remember to the letter what you said to me
underneath that old growing drawing tree
but i don't really know
if this is really how it goes
but that's how it is in my memory.
well a few years flew and we talked a lot
we smiled when we were blessed (and whined when we were not)
and the tree was cut down, and the school was too
but you were always there when i needed you.
and then it goes that you said one day
something else that really blew my mind away
said i couldn't couldn't sink without my own consent,
and i have to say
you were my lifeboat anyway.
(i hope that you can't see me now
bubble bubble pop!
can't even reach the top
cause i've sunk so far and i Won't crawl out.)
and i didn't didn't recognize our last salute
for a last, or i would have acted differently
hugged you, maybe told you
how much you meant to me.
[and i never never did; now i never never can]
still i'm shocked, and i feel worse for your family.
still i'm shocked! and i want trek back! i inveigh!
still i'm shocked, and i wish i knew
what to say.